Wow. Think about this: “When a man does not have all his experiences at his disposal he tends to make only those available to others that fit best the image he wants to have of himself and his world.” (p. 38) This is a constant theme for Nouwen in his first two books: We can only minister who have first transversed the inner landscape of our souls and are willing to make that journey available to others. When we block off or deny parts of ourselves we limit our ability to connect with others so they can be open to the Word of God.
Nouwen states in “Creative Ministry” that when a student wants to have a teacher s/he must first open her inner experiences to the teacher as a source of insight and understanding. Only then, he says, can the teacher become teacher. Further, the teacher must be open to learning from the student, to be a student herself. This bilateral engagement creates the connection for creative learning and not just top down feeding. In other words, for Nouwen, the move to friendship is a move to intimacy and thereby a move to a true learning context. The student opens up himself to the teacher and now competition and fear are gone. When Christ said to his disciples, “I shall not call you servants anymore, but friends,” (Jn. 15:14) Nouwen says he was leading them into a place where he could really teach them.
Nouwen says that a person must forget about himself for a while so that he can become really interested in another, “that is, enter into the center of his concerns.” (p50) This is the way, Nouwen says, to create space where God can do His work. I have dealt with this problem in marital counseling many times. One partner is so self focused and personally engaged and defended that they cannot be interested in the other. This detachment is the result of making and insisting on self as the center. Under these circumstances, intimacy is impossible and so is any sense of meaningful relaionship. In ministry, the same holds true. We cannot care for another unless we “deny self” and create connection and space for God.
Richard Rohr, in a daily email devotion today said, “Our path of ongoing transformation (after the great falling into Love) largely consists in struggling with our own shadow self, facing interior conflicts and moral failures, undergoing rejection, abandonment, or humiliations, and learning to experience any limitations gracefully. Sorry to put it so bluntly, but these are the common gateways into deeper consciousness and the flowering of the soul. They alone prune away the illusions and pretenses of the false self. (See John 15:2 for example.)”
Nowen, so aptly points out “Self-affirmation and self-emptying are not opposites because no one can give away what he does not have.”
Self-affirmation is not an aggrandisement of the self; it is an honest engagement with the Spirit in the inner places that leads to a change of heart and change of loves. From this place comes the strength to lay down ones life.
The Inner Life
Wow. Think about this: “When a man does not have all his experiences at his disposal he tends to make only those available to others that fit best the image he wants to have of himself and his world.” (p. 38) This is a constant theme for Nouwen in his first two books: We can only minister who have first transversed the inner landscape of our souls and are willing to make that journey available to others. When we block off or deny parts of ourselves we limit our ability to connect with others so they can be open to the Word of God.
Students, Friends, and Teachers.
Nouwen states in “Creative Ministry” that when a student wants to have a teacher s/he must first open her inner experiences to the teacher as a source of insight and understanding. Only then, he says, can the teacher become teacher. Further, the teacher must be open to learning from the student, to be a student herself. This bilateral engagement creates the connection for creative learning and not just top down feeding. In other words, for Nouwen, the move to friendship is a move to intimacy and thereby a move to a true learning context. The student opens up himself to the teacher and now competition and fear are gone. When Christ said to his disciples, “I shall not call you servants anymore, but friends,” (Jn. 15:14) Nouwen says he was leading them into a place where he could really teach them.
Forget About Yourself
Nouwen says that a person must forget about himself for a while so that he can become really interested in another, “that is, enter into the center of his concerns.” (p50) This is the way, Nouwen says, to create space where God can do His work. I have dealt with this problem in marital counseling many times. One partner is so self focused and personally engaged and defended that they cannot be interested in the other. This detachment is the result of making and insisting on self as the center. Under these circumstances, intimacy is impossible and so is any sense of meaningful relaionship. In ministry, the same holds true. We cannot care for another unless we “deny self” and create connection and space for God.
Self Affirmation and Self Emptying
Richard Rohr, in a daily email devotion today said, “Our path of ongoing transformation (after the great falling into Love) largely consists in struggling with our own shadow self, facing interior conflicts and moral failures, undergoing rejection, abandonment, or humiliations, and learning to experience any limitations gracefully. Sorry to put it so bluntly, but these are the common gateways into deeper consciousness and the flowering of the soul. They alone prune away the illusions and pretenses of the false self. (See John 15:2 for example.)”
Nowen, so aptly points out “Self-affirmation and self-emptying are not opposites because no one can give away what he does not have.”
Self-affirmation is not an aggrandisement of the self; it is an honest engagement with the Spirit in the inner places that leads to a change of heart and change of loves. From this place comes the strength to lay down ones life.